If our self-talk is negative or based on untruths, it can create traps that not only steer us away from God but make our lives miserable. Once we learn to recognize this, we can seek to discover the truth from God’s Word. In his Resolving Spiritual Conflicts and Cross-cultural Ministry Workbook,1 Dr. Timothy Warner shares a few broad lies and deceptions that infect us and can misshape our identity. Here are a few examples, along with the biblical truths that counter these fraudulent claims:

LIE: “Our identity comes from what we have done.” This lie permeates every segment of our culture. If held strongly, this belief will feel like a “performance trap” creating a workaholic, driven, and perfectionistic attitude.
TRUTH: God’s response is simple but profound – everything we have is from Him and belongs to Him (James 1:17, Romans 11:36). We only have what we have because of His grace (John 3:27). Therefore, there is absolutely nothing we can do to earn His love (Romans 5:8). We only must accept it (Ephesians 2:8).

LIE: “Our identity comes from what people say about us.” This is an inescapable lie in today’s culture. Certainly, reputation and social approval are important, but we can be lured into an “approval trap” if they become the sole determinant of our identity. We can become overly sensitive to criticism and withdraw from others out of fear of rejection.
TRUTH: Jesus’ response to this is that we are His beloved (Colossians 3:12), that nothing can separate us from Him (Romans 8:38-39), and that He calls us friend (John 15:15).

LIE: “Your behavior tells you what to believe about yourself.” This is a more subtle lie. Our beliefs about ourselves—and not how we behave—shape our identity and ultimately our emotional response to situations.
TRUTH: Jesus taught us that following rules was not the key to change but what flows out of our hearts is what counts (Mark 12:33). He gave us a new command, one based on love (John 13:34).

 

1 Dr. Timothy M. Warner, Resolving Spiritual Conflicts and Cross-cultural Ministry Workbook, Freedom in Christ Ministries, 1993. Information listed from Dr. Timothy Warner is based on an adaptation by Dr. Neil Anderson.